There are many different tips, advices and strategies to improve our lives. Part of them we find very useful, while others don’t work at all. At least for us.
Very often I read many fantastic advices from different self-improvement, personal development, GTD or productivity masters and I’m getting frustrated when a lot of their tips don’t trigger. Is there something wrong with me? No, definitely not.
Each of us is unique. Each of us has different personality, life experiences, knowlegde, abilities, habits and so on. It shouldn’t be suprising, that different ideas turn us on, that we prefer different approaches. The next time, when you will try to improve your life with another hack and you will find it not working so well, try to act in opposite way. It might be more appealing to you.
photo credit: s-t-r-a-n-g-e
Below are my best five pairs of contrary strategies.
Small step vs. “full force”.
When you set a new goal, the first step is very important. It helps you to get involved into your new project and create a momentum that will put you further into next steps. I used to set this first step very small. Why? To accomplish it easily and relatively quickly. I like this tip, but sometimes, this small step is not the best option. Sometimes my goal is so important or achieving it is so desired by me, that I have extremely strong motivation and a lot of energy to work on it. I am fascinated about it. Then, I use a “full force” mode. I don’t create small steps, I don’t track everything. It’s waste of time. I act, right now! I do as much as possible. I commit a lot of time and energy; I use all my resources and skills. Focus is 100% on goal and on things I have to perform in order to accomplish. I must say, I love this “full force” state. There are no other worries, no distractions, progress is really amazing and a work becomes pure passion.
Focus on your best abilities and resources vs. improve your weak points.
Each of us has some great abilities and resources. Exploit them to maximum. This is for sure great strategy. Perform activities that you are strong at. But, is it worth to work on your weak points? Some people say, it is a waste of time, that it is not possible, to be good at everything. I agree, but sometimes it is very lucrative to work on your Achilles’ heel.
At secondary shool I had serious problems with physics. I was so angry at my teacher that I decided to show him I can master this science. I succeed. After secondary shool, I started computer science at Physics Department at university. This means that I had a lot of physics. I was very happy that I had beaten my weakness before. It helped me a lot at university. Now I love physics.
Always think about benefits you will gain from mastering a new skill. Imagine that you have already developed it. How would your life change? Is it easier now to go forward? Decision is up to you.
Help others vs. say “no”.
This opposition is really tough for me. I enjoy helping other people. No matter, if they are family, friends, co-workers, my kung-fu brothers and sisters or if they are from any on-line society.
Everybody needs to feel that he or she is useful. It is also nice to help others and hear a simple thank you, not to mention that very often you can expect to get the favour back.
Unfortunately, helping others consumes two of the most important resources - time and energy. You can’t always be at service for everybody, because you will not be able to work on your goals and perform your tasks. A lot of people will try to get help from you as often as it possible. If you help them once, they will ask you more and more times. Even if they can do their jobs without your help. Avoid them. Say ‘no’. Decline.
Try following approach, only for a week. Say that you are busy, that you have a lot of important tasks and you can’t help at the moment. But remember to be polite. When you get an e-mail with any request - delete it. If it was important, someone will send you another one. Focus only on executing your tasks and achieving your goals.
Compare your productivity and effectiveness while you test both approaches in a certain period of time. Evaluate props and cons. With some practise, you will knoq, when and whom you should help, and when to say that your services are not available at the moment.
Unclutterer vs clutterer.
Uncluttering is very popular and effective idea to organize your space. Recently I uncluttered my room, now it is very minimalist. It works great for me. But this is not a mandatory for everybody. Some people don’t need uncluttered workspace, house or electronic documents. They feel and work better when they are surrounded by tons of random things. It is possible that you are clutterer. Remember to ask yourself a question - is it your way or are you simply lazy?
Saving vs. spending.
Of course saving money is very important for personal finances. I like saving money. I can invest them and generate more money. It is a great strategy leading to financial success. But I also like spending a lot of money on different things. Both necessary and unnecessary. Is it bad? Not at all. All in all, you earn money to spend it.
Buying different things usually makes us happy. Being happy is in my opinion more important than being frugal. Of course, the best is to be happy and frugal simultaneously.
Another point is that, buying different things increases our comfort of life. Higher comfort of life means we are safer, happier, healthier and more creative, better motivated. Finally this may lead us to increasing our earnings. Sounds great but this also doesn’t work for everybody. For some people it is easier to live frugal and save money, other prefers to spend a lot while focusing on increasing income. I admit, I’m not white or black, here. I’m somewhere in the middle. I always try to save in ways that don’t decrease my comfort of life and I always try to increase my comfort of life in ways that don’t require high expenditure. This way appeals to me and what is more important, works pretty well.
Next time you will start incorporating a new idea into your life, remember to consider the opposite one. It is possible; the other way would work better for you.
